~Toughbooktalk~

Good to hear. Praying for a full recovery.

Praying for your quick and full recovery.

Hi guys . This will be short. I am on phone. Doing well. This has been scary.
Test today to check my st jude heart valve..
THANK YOU fir the wishes and prayers.


I have been having issues for quite a while. Issues with my faith.
I am asking anyone who has faith to Pm me your story. Help me beleive again...I had faith at one time time.

weeelll shawn ,

i'll save a couple of button clicks and post here .
you know enough of my story to know that "faith" is where , when and how you find it ...
or should i say that i have "re-found" it many times over the last 28 years .
as my old landlady (and fellow member) used to tell me quite often : "you can live happily ever after many times in your life" .
i came to find that faith is not something that is spooned full-strength out of a jar ... but rather it develops over time .
and i have to remember that time is not measured by my means .

come to think of and about it ...
no one has ever told me that my"faith" will happen and always be at 100% .
so , that means that it is subject to variance ...
and that is OK for today .

there are some things that i have a tough time remembering ... because my built-in forgetter works very well .
i tend to forget the feeling that happens when i finally realize i have been through something and am out the other side of it .
to me , "faith" means getting out of and going beyond *my self* .

get weller dammit !

Glad to see you're out and about.

THanks guys. I'm home and tired.........The hospital is no place to get better


I have heard a couple amazing tales of faith.......Hoping to hear more.

An update.....First of all I have been preoccupied and not "at my best" This too will pass.....
I did sign up for a health plan that will start Feb 1.....Boss is helping pay for it...

I sent the following to someone in a PM this morning...It seemed easiest to copy/paste it..

I am moving along One day at a time..
I finally slept the night straight through last night....My sleep patterns have been way off.
I have a lot going on in my head.......Not really anxiety, but not ever really relaxed and just "being". I have not tried any Toughbook work. I don't think I could focus enough. It just doesn't seem interesting at the moment...
I prioritize things and only seem to be able to do what must be done today...Decisions are difficult..It's all kind of hard to describe...
Not sure how the medical bills will work out. Have to wait for the aide agencies to get back to me..I can't be very proactive. That's causing me stress I suppose...

Thanks guys

hey shawn ,

sounds like some of the same stuff i had going on three years back when i wound up in intensive care for 5 days .
yeah ... i was "wormy" for quite some time ... i couldn't do s*** .
i was mentally and physically weak .
the only thing that really helped me to get through it was the spirituality that i managed bank up and learn about .

stuff like you have and are going through is taxing on a person ... no doubt about it .
heh ... sometimes it is not "one day at a time" ... it's more like "now just lemme get through the next few minutes" .
this stuff will change a person (speaking only for myself and what i gleaned from *others*) .

the financial and other stuff will be worked out .
remember ... "fear of economic insecurity ..." , will go away ... along with a bunch of other crap .
"one day at a time"

i suppose you don't feel like going to a meeting .
has anyone stopped on by and fired up the coffee pot ?
it might be a good idea .

Yep,been there and done that.The bills will get paid,or not, and life will go on.It really is one day at a time,it gets to feel like the weight of the world is on you. It's not,just set it down and take a look around,you are still here,there are people who care,and you are doing pretty good.

'course none of us is gettin' any better looking but...what the hey.

Glad to hear from you, and the news that your boss is going to help out with the health plan is great.
Getting a full nights sleep is good news, wishing you have many more.
You know we are here if you need us.